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First, I want to acknowledge that all this-back-to-the-office talk must be pretty entertaining for the people who do the real work 鈥� construction, maintenance, retail, restaurants, transportation, warehouse work, building airplanes, public safety, and 鈥� the most important job in any civilized society 鈥� trash collection.

You have to show up in person.

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But people like me who sit at computer screens and can work anywhere are in a tug-of-war with bosses who want them back at the office.

And to convince their bosses that they can be just as productive at home, some of them have been gaming the software.

According to , it鈥檚 called 鈥淧roductivity Theater鈥� 鈥� where you wiggle the mouse every so often, join meetings you don鈥檛 need to be in, update your status 鈥� whatever it takes for the productivity software to show you as being actively engaged.

Apparently, productivity software is that stupid.

For example, according to my productivity dashboard last week Feliks Banel, our resident historian, and I spent 15 hours attending the same meetings. It even recommends that Feliks and I consider dividing up our meetings and sharing notes to save time!

Well, as regular listeners know, Feliks and I work together for about ten minutes, twice a week, Wednesdays and Fridays. If the software is that unreliable for someone like me who is back at the office, I can see why it鈥檚 so easy to game it from home.

My dashboard also displays my top collaborators.

James, our producer is number 1 鈥� that gets an A-plus, Colleen is there too 鈥� also A-plus, but no mention of Chris, even though we spend three hours a day in the same studio! And instead of Chris, it lists seven listeners I鈥檝e聽never met as being among my top collaborators! OK 鈥� we鈥檝e exchanged e-mails, but collaborators? Hardly.

And yet as flawed as this software is, if you work-at-homers continue your boycott, that software will have to become more and more intrusive, because bosses need to know you鈥檙e working.

Now in my case, it鈥檚 easy 鈥� they can just turn on the radio.

But for those of you not on the radio, if you鈥檙e not in your cubicle where a supervisor can walk by and say, 鈥渉ey how鈥檚 it going?鈥� 鈥撀� they鈥檙e going to turn to artificial intelligence, cell phones programmed to listen to your breathing, and eventually insect-sized drones that perch on your shoulder.

If you draw a paycheck, one way or another, your company is going to make sure you deserve it. So, you might as well come back.

It鈥檚 either the human supervisor or the insect drone. Buzzzzzz? No thanks.

Listen to Seattle鈥檚 Morning News with Dave Ross and Colleen O鈥橞rien weekday mornings from 5 鈥� 9 a.m. on 成人X站 Newsradio, 97.3 FM. Subscribe to the聽podcast here.